Weird

The Downsides Of Having Sex With a Female Bodybuilder

Weird


Constant Emasculation

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You get back to your place, decide to make a couple drinks. She wants a caesar. You grab the jar of pickles from the fridge, and you can’t quite get it open on your first try. When you bring a bodybuilding lady back to your place, you only get one crack at it before she snatches it from your hand and opens it herself, first try. You make a joke about how you had already loosened it up, but she just stares back at you with dead eyes.

Being Naked Infront of Her

"And now for my next trick..."

“And now for my next trick…”

Unless you’re the #1 alpha dog at your gym, this chick’s going to have muscles that you didn’t even know existed and they’re going to be bigger than yours so brace yourself for that. You two make your way back to the bedroom, and you can’t help but admire her gains for a second until she snaps her fingers assertively and tells you to remove your clothing. You hesitantly derobe, she smirks a bit and asks where you store your “bucket of lube.”

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Since you’re unaware that they even sell lube by the “bucket”, she notices that you look confused and explains:

“Honey, I’ve been dead down there since my first cycle. Unless you want to try shoving a hotdog into a rubber glove, you best get me real slippery.”

If you had any sense, this is where you would find an excuse to get rid of her… But she’s really intimidating, and frankly you’re kind of afraid.

She’ll Be Harder Than You

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It’s a weird moment when you realize that her C is harder than your D and about the same size. She’s crammed her body full of so much testosterone that if the pharmacy was an all-you-can-eat-buffet, she’d be the family of 4 taking up 8 seats.

There’s no turning back now, it’s time to do the deed.

Her Not-So-Gentle Touch

When your lover’s gentle caress feels more like a hulk smash, you know you’re in over your head.

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You got it in, now you’re trying to finish this up as quickly as possible but things feel kind of weird down there. She insists on being on top, and literally forces you down when you try to move. You aren’t sure what’s happening here, but you’re pretty sure that you don’t consent to it. You decide it’s time to just pull out and run away, but she’s got a vice grip around your package and you aren’t going anywhere.

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She finally lets out a masculine howl and crawls off of you. You hear wolves off in the distance answering her call, and you try to sit up.

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She pushes you back down and has this really troubling look on her face. She reaches into her purse, pulls something out, picks you up and flips you over on the bed.

It’s a Two Way Street

When  a female bodybuilder gets that look in her eyes, it’s time to just run away bro, cos you’re about to get pegged.

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h/t Broscience


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